i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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