Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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