I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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