Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
