butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize