Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize