Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
