...so i touched it.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Randomize
