My nipple is on Facebook.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
