Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Randomize
