I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
