it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Randomize
