How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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