let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
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