Me too!
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
