where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
