so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
