I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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