She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
