I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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