I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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