I bet he comes in French.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize