it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
