i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
