so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
