We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
