Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
