Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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