do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
