That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
