if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
