where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
