I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
