now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
