Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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