My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
this boner is exhausting
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize