Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
