ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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