alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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