Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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