Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
