just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Randomize