Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
