marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
