Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
