My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
