why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
