Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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