I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
