he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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