How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
